I distinctly remember the moment I stopped being a victim. I was working at a dot com back in the nineties. After weeks of all-nighters the engineers were tapped out, demoralized, and close to mutiny. We were whining more than we were working. It was a death spiral.
Our CIO called an all-hands meeting and I’ll never forget it. She didn’t try to bribe us, or berate us, or insult us with some rah rah B.S. All she said was, you’re living the life you chose.
It’s strange how a statement of the obvious can be anything but. For weeks I had been resenting the big bad corporation for exploiting me. I had turned myself into a victim. But my employer wasn’t doing anything to me. By choosing to stay there I was doing it to myself.
If your health goals are stalled, the temptation to blame others for your problems is almost irresistable. Don’t eat enough vegetables? Blame the supermarkets for not being covenient enough. Your pants don’t fit anymore? It’s McDonald’s fault for being too delicious. You feel insecure at the gym? How dare fit people show up and work hard in your presence!
Jobs come and go, and tragically, relationships aren’t what they used to be. But you only get one body. Just one. And every day you get to choose what to put into it. You get to choose whether or not to show up for a WOD. You get to choose.
You’re not a victim.